Last Saturday my parents met Rich's parents for the first time. I was pretty calm in the lead up, even calm that morning when we did house stuff (tip, charity shop) then as soon as I got home to start cooking the tension I was feeling - my gawd - was so tense. All manner of questions were running through my mind - what happens if they didn't get on? Or the conversation dried up? Or they started bringing up embarrassing stories of stroppy teens (probably about me - my teens were not my finest hour).
We had planned the menu far in advance - sweet potato and bacon soup, tasty bread, brie, pate and fresh fruit for pudding. Minimum menu fuss was the order of the day: no awkward things to cut, easy to digest, no-one caught with a great whopping piece of food in their teeth at that awkward stage between the asking of a question and the realisation that the recipient of said questions has a mouthful. We served the food in an 80's buffet style so people could sit in the lounge and feel relaxed, rather than sit around a table and it feel forced. (Plus we didn't have enough chairs for the sitting around the dining room table!)
My Dad, Tom Roper (that's what I call him - a relic left over from those not so fine teenage years), gave me a hug upon arrival and whispered, "You alright?" and I said, "I'm so nervous!" But when everyone had arrived my hands unclamped and I felt more relaxed - it was like a mass job interview where everyone was going to come away with a job. Just questions and answers and a happy ending. This was always going to be a daunting afternoon - so many different personalities in one room - but everyone just got along.
As I peeled and chopped what seemed like the entire contents of the fruit & veg section at Tesco my fear eyes were in full force.
We had planned the menu far in advance - sweet potato and bacon soup, tasty bread, brie, pate and fresh fruit for pudding. Minimum menu fuss was the order of the day: no awkward things to cut, easy to digest, no-one caught with a great whopping piece of food in their teeth at that awkward stage between the asking of a question and the realisation that the recipient of said questions has a mouthful. We served the food in an 80's buffet style so people could sit in the lounge and feel relaxed, rather than sit around a table and it feel forced. (Plus we didn't have enough chairs for the sitting around the dining room table!)
My Dad, Tom Roper (that's what I call him - a relic left over from those not so fine teenage years), gave me a hug upon arrival and whispered, "You alright?" and I said, "I'm so nervous!" But when everyone had arrived my hands unclamped and I felt more relaxed - it was like a mass job interview where everyone was going to come away with a job. Just questions and answers and a happy ending. This was always going to be a daunting afternoon - so many different personalities in one room - but everyone just got along.
It was an awesome afternoon - plenty of chats about walking, teaching, the opportunities that retirement has brought, grandchildren, books, Wolf Hall, the wedding. And laughing - lots and lots of laughing.
The wider implications weren't lost on me - my mum and dad are gaining a son-in-law and Rich's parents are gaining a daughter-in-law. Far beyond everyone turning up to see Rich and I get wed, these relationships will last a lifetime,
Rich's family used to joke that the first time they would know he had a girlfriend was when they got a wedding invitation. to which Rich replied, "what makes you think you'd get an invite?" And I think my parents had really given up hope after I became self-employed and spent my Friday nights reading fashion blogs. So it was an especially heartwarming when Rich's Mum, Jennifer, said to my Mum
"We are very happy about this."
to which my Mum replied
"Yes, so are we."
It's always nice to get the parental seal of approval!
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