#WeddingWednesday - What's in a Name?

Photo taken by Anna Hardy Photography

Thought I'd do a "what's happened since I tied the knot" blog post. Here are some key highlights:

• I fallen more in love with Rich. 
• Joyful weeping is still a 'thing'. 
• I have started to have 'proper' weekends which means NO checking emails, no looking at or listing things on eBay. 
• We plan tasty meals to cook and which adventures to take around our manor. I even have a note in my phone "buy sensible walking shoes." That's marital bliss right there.
• I've become more house proud. As I type this there is a guy dousing the office and bedroom carpets with a hefty dose of chemicals to get them clean. I'm obsessed with cleaning the shower screen, we've put up a picture feature wall at the top of the stairs, not to mention the couple of hours we spent 'gardening' last weekend which involved digging up manky rhubarb that was the size and weight of a small child. With orange roots, weirdly.
• Our wedding is going to be featured on Love My Dress. After asking guests not to put any photos of our wedding on social media I threw all my principles to the wind when this opportunity came a'callin. So here's another wedding pic for you to enjoy...

We used this shot for our 'thank you' cards

• Long-term conversations have taken place - when to start a family, how we will balance that with me being self-employed. We've even nailed what to call our kids. 

And now for the meaty stuff. I have found changing my name really hard and I didn't expect this and it has thrown me. I happily signed our 1st set of Christmas cards post-wedding Mr & Mrs Brown - it was a fun 'hey look as us, we're married! This is still so original and new!' type thing. Receiving post addressed to Mrs Brown was a novelty at first but then I started to feel as if a stranger was living in the house. Ringing various companies up to change my name I received loads of congratulations from the opticians, the doctor, the dentist. But with each call I got a sinking feeling - I was giving up a piece of my past in exchange for a joint future. The people that I have my pension with require a strange amount of ID for me to change my name on their system so I gave up and left that as Miss Roper. Then I received a letter from them addressed to Miss Roper and I felt a little indignant but happy to see my old name still existed in some form. I was all "but I'm a Mrs now, I'm married, except I'm used to Roper so hoorah old buddy! my old friend! nice to see you! but oh, wait, I'm a Brown now and that is a little unknown and a bit scary so is there another option I can use for now? Mrs (Roper) Brown perhaps?"

I am still Stephanie Roper for work as The Wardrobe Angel and out of work I am Stephanie Brown so some might say I have the best of both worlds but I just don't see it as that 'neat' and boxed off. Calling into my parent's house the other week, my Dad greeted me by saying "Mrs Brown." I visibly palled. Honestly, I feel part of who I was has been ripped away. I never thought giving up my name would be so hard: that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, right? Well, no, because it's not just a name, it was 35 years of my identity. 

Do remember when a Snickers used to be a Marathon and when Star Burst used to be Opal Fruits (made to make your mouth water)? Both tasty confections went through a rename and came out the other side. I'm sure I'll get used to it, that this feeling of separation anxiety for Roper will reside and my residency as Mrs Brown will become the norm. Maybe it just takes a few more bits of post through the door and ordering everyone to call me Mrs Brown until it finally sinks in?

In the meantime, I'm off to raid the confectionery counter. 

Stay wardrobe happy...til next time x

The Wardrobe Angel

#WeddingWednesday - Reader, I married him

Mr & Mrs Brown 

Well reader, I am now officially Mrs Brown! October 3rd was such a special and memorable day. I am back at work today which is not so special and memorable in comparison! So with that in mind I've put together my top tips for brides & grooms for the immediate days after your wedding day:

Wear something really special the day after 

your wedding

The thought of pulling on jeans and a t-shirt the day after my wedding nearly brought me to tears. You've just worn what was potentially the most awesome outfit of your life and you are bookending it with jeans? No. Way. I wore my trusty H&M Trend Jumpsuit with my Jimmy Choo wedding shoes. Yes I was tired, yes I was emotional, yes my face wasn't nearly as awesome as when Natalie Willingham waved her bridal make-up wand over it the day before but my jumpsuit made me feel really glam and was a gentle step down rather than a gigantic lurch away from my wedding dress. Rich wore a vintage wool blazer and an awesome Zara shirt. Yep - natty dressers united! Team Brown!

Carry tissues at all times

The beach at Sheringham - there may or may not have been some joyful weeping standing on this beach

At risk of sounding like a right Nana this one has proved particularly useful. My emotions have been so close to the surface for the past month that my propensity for joyful weeping is at critical mass. I didn't weep on my wedding day until our first dance when Rich gallantly kissed away the torrent of tears coursing down my face. There's a really awkward photo of us at the end of our first dance where my face is stricken with panic - the thought running through my head was

"crap - I think I've ruined my make-up." 

We went to Norfolk for our mini-moon where I had many a moment of pure bliss including standing on the high street in Sheringham: the sun was shining, the sky was blue, I could see the sea, I had just bought a beautiful gift for my friend's new baby, Rich and I were hand-in-hand and BOOM: joyful weeping.  My weeping consists of those hot tears that just spill out of your eyes. I don't really make a sound but it can be quite unnerving for passers by so either use said tissues to mop up your tears or cover your face entirely, either way it's a bridal win.

Savour the magic and fairy dust 

The back of our wedding invites created by the wonderfully talented Becky Lord

Getting married, the lead up, rehearsal, ceremony and after-party is like being in a special bubble where you are buffeted by happiness and joy, carried along by smiles and hugs and wrapped in a big ole' blanket of love. Pretty much all this feeling is directed at you - people want to speak to you, they want to hug you, talk to you, share the love with you. I felt utterly blessed to have close friends and family surround us on our wedding day but the feeling of coming back to reality the week after was like waking up in a draining bath, cold and prune-like. Those special wedding day feelings are so immeasurably special because you don't feel them to that intensity everyday.  But you do still have some wedding day glitter, some sparkle, some marriage fairy dust at your disposal - you have the photos and more importantly, cherished memories. We started a memory box for our wedding - all the RSVP's, a copy of our invitation, the sweet bags we had printed, some of the bunting that my gorgeous sister-in-law kindly made for us, my headpiece and the pearls used to hand-tie my bouquet. Jeez - even writing this I'm fishing for a tissue!! Excuse me whilst I indulge in a joyful weeping moment ...

Til next time...x